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Tuesday, December 23, 2008

Thankful for Mary’s Example

I have been thinking about the reason we celebrate the season. There are so many reasons for the magic of the Christmas season. The real reason is the birth of the Christ child. I am so grateful for the birth of baby Jesus, and his life of example and his sacrifice. I often ponder the life his earthly mother must have had. The Christmas carol "Mary did You Know" is one of my favorite. I believe that she did know who her baby was. Yet at the same time how could a human mother truly know and understand what that would mean. She watched her baby take the same steps of life that I have watched my own children take. As a mother I think in some small, very small, way I know how she must have felt that blessed night. When holding my new born children feeling the responsibility of raising them to be productive, kind, loving people who know that they are children of Heavenly Father. To know that the child you have been blessed with is so much more than that. That you have been chosen to raise the Son of God, that is a responsibility I am not worthy of nor do I think I want. With all my human frailties I am scared I will fail my children, let alone fail to be the mother the Christ child would need. If I were Mary I would have been terrified of that responsibility. Mary had so many obstacles to face in being the mother of the Christ Child. Yet raising the Son of God would be the most overwhelming of all.

I am not sure if any of this makes sense to anyone else but me. I am in no way trying to compare my life to Mary and her earthly family, but trying to understand the life she must have had. I am wanting to use her example to become a better mother to my own children.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Your rainbow is strongly shaded pink.


What is says about you: You are a grateful person. You appreciate everyone around you. You are a good listener and your friends are glad to have you around in difficult times.

Find the colors of your rainbow at

Sunday, December 7, 2008

Five Dollars and Thirty-Eight Cents

After the whole lice thing and all the laundry that entaled. I was about half way through the laundry when my washer suddenly quite spinning. The clothes were soaked, but he washer would not spin them out. I ask Stephen to take a look at it, he did he could not figure it out. It is still under warrenty so I called Best Buy, to have them come out and take a look. That was Monday.
Best Buy:"We can be there Thrusday between 8 and Noon."
Me: "uh no I have a final that day at school"
Best Buy: " What would be a better day for you"
Me: "Today would be good"
Best Buy:"I am sorry, but we cann't do it today."
My next thought was well why did you ask then.
Best Buy: "We can be out on Saturday, between 8am and noon."
My thought was are we supposed to be naked until then!!!!!!!!
Me: "well if that is when the next available time is then okay."
I was franitc to try to figure out how to get us some clothes for the week. I ended up taking a load a couple of times to my neighbor and then Stephen took several loads to his parents house before work, then picked it up on the way home. Thank you Carol and David for doing our dirty underwear.
Well Saturday came and I got the call from Geek Squad to fix the washer. Mind you, Ashlyn had a slumber party Friday night, I still had 6 little 4th graders at the house, and parents on the way. I still had several things to do to get the kids ready to go to Nana and Papa's for the evening. They were taking them out to the Gaylord Texan and to dinner, while Stephen and I went to his company Christmas party.
Geek Squad:" I will be there to fix your washer between 2 and 4pm"
Me:" UH...NO! I had an appointment time between 8 and noon. We have a Christmas Party tonight."
Geek Squad:"Well I will not be in your area until after noon"
Me:"Well SOMEONE, meaning you, needs to call your dispatchers and get things straight."
Geek Squad:"What is the lasted time I can be there"
Geek Squad:"Well........I try to be there by then"
ME:"Yes you will be here by then. Thank you"
He showed up about 10:30. I told him thank you and that I knew I was short but this had been a long week with no washer and I had a house full when he called. I was trying to be nice.
After about 30 minutes he came out and said
Geek Squad: " It is fixed. Five dollars and thirty-eight cents.
Me: Shocked look on my face "It is under warrenty"
Geek Squad: "It's five dollars and thirty eight cents."
Me: "I don't understand it is under warrenty. I did no think there was a charge at all"
Geek Squad: "I could not help it... There was fiuve dollors and thirty eight cents in the motor it was keeping it from spining. That was your problem"
Me: "Oh I get it. That was a good one. How in the world... Well thank you"

Monday, December 1, 2008

Ashlyn’s Birth Story

About 6 months after we were married we started to try to have a baby.  We both wanted a child very badly.  After about 6 months of trying we went to the doctor and found out that I did not ovulate and the use of fertility drugs were needed if I was to get pregnant.  I spent the better part of the next 3 years trying Clomid.  We did not have insurance for infertility so going any further was not an option.  During a break from the drugs, I had hernia surgery, 2 weeks later a car wreck and found out that day I was pregnant.  What a shock, no drugs, not even trying.


While I was pregnant I was sent for a level 2 sonogram, because Stephen had the submucus cleft.  I was told that they did not see a cleft lip so they did not think that there would be a cleft palate.  I thought at that point "well he did not have the lip so why should we think the baby should."  I did not say anything at the time.  We were told not to expect anything but they could not give us a guarantee.


I was due Nov. 25,1997. I went to the doctor on the 24th and he said if I had not had the baby by Dec. 2nd he would induce that morning. Well, the end of Nov. came and went, so we headed to the hospital early in the morning on Dec. 2nd.  When we got there, I was dilated to a 3. They started inducing at 8:30, by 10:00 the doctor felt I was far enough along to break the water. When they did they found the baby's first bowel movement. It was my first time, but I did know that that was not a good sign.


As they had me change positions we watched the baby's heart drop. The only way I could lay, that her heart rate would not drop, was on my left side. She was sitting on the nerve in that hip, laying on that side was starting to really hurt. With her heart rate dropping we knew that something was very wrong. I did not want an epidural at all, but if I had to have a C-section that was the only way I would get to be awake.


About 1:00 the nurse asked if I wanted the epidural. I asked what the chances were of me getting to push out the baby myself. She said 70/30 against. I wanted to be awake so I could see her immediately and so Stephen could be in the operating room with me. So I took the epidural. It didn't work. I still had all feeling in my left side and most in my right. I was becoming very frantic by now things were not looking good, the baby's heart beat was still dropping and so many people were in and out of the room checking things.


They then said, that the epidural did not work and it would have to be done again. We asked for a few minutes to pray about it.  (I had not handled the first one well and the prospect of having to do it again was not sitting well)

Stephen went out to see the doctor, to see if anything could be done so they did not have to redo it. He was watching the monitors and on the phone with the office. He told the office to cancel his next appointments and told Stephen that the epidural did not matter there was no more time.


The doctor came back in the room followed by Stephen and said "We're going now".  Wire and monitors came flying off of me as they got me ready to go. As I left, I heard them tell Stephen to change his clothes and they would show him where to go so he could watch through the door.


As they were taking me down to the operating room I was crying. The nurses were apologizing about it not going the way I had planned. That did not matter to me I had no idea what was wrong with my baby, whatever was best for her.

I prayed that I had come this far I could not stand to lose her now, but that GOD's will was to be done, but if all was okay GOD give me peace. I got it that instant. I was scared but I knew that it would be okay.


3:01pm was the last time I saw as they pulled the sheet up over me and I heard my doctor say "we're going in." I thought "now!?!? I'm not asleep yet" that was all I remember until the nurses wake me up in recovery.

Stephen came in and told me we had a beautiful baby girl and she was very healthy. She had a total cleft palate but she was okay.


The doctor decided to go on in because they had totally lost her heart beat for a few seconds and he could no longer watch the heart rate go up and down like that. When they got in, they found out why. Her cord was wrapped around her neck 3 times. Before they broke the water she was fine, the water kept it from tightening up.


I had been around babies since a very young age.  But this was our first and I was unsure of how to feed her with the cleft, but I really wanted to breastfeed.  We tried for the first day and it was just not working.  I did give up on it, and went to the cleft bottles they had in the nursery.  I stayed the full 4 days that I could for the section to make sure I was able to feed her.  As we were working on that we made the phone call to Dr. Salyer's office for our first appointment."